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Everything Your Relatives Fear About Berkeley

Posted on March 25, 2023March 26, 2023 by: Abhi Ganesh

‘Ryanair Is SO Cheap’ and 2 Other Ways to Act Like Your Spring Break in Europe Hasn’t Put You in Financial Ruin

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Tag: Lily Green

Posted on May 22, 2020September 11, 2021 by: Lily Green

I’m A Republican and I Think COVID-19 Is Nothing Compared To Those Scary Clowns From 2016

America, we will never be able to agree on everything. We all want what’s best for our country, and we all have different ideas of …

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Posted on April 12, 2020September 22, 2021 by: Lily Green

Quarantined with 1D?!

I wake up to my parents standing above me. I blink a few times, rubbing my light blue orbs to get rid of my sleepiness. …

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Posted on February 13, 2020September 11, 2021 by: Lily Green

Andrew Yang Announces Road Trip With Beto O’Rourke After Suspending Campaign

BREAKING NEWS: As of February 11, 2020, Andrew Yang announced he will be suspending his presidential campaign. Yang ran an innovative campaign known for its …

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Posted on February 4, 2020September 11, 2021 by: Lily Green

Team Edward Caucusing For Joe Biden

According to polling data out of Iowa, the majority of Team Edward is enthusiastically looking forward to supporting Former Vice President Joe Biden in the …

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Posted on December 17, 2019September 11, 2021 by: Lily Green

The 10 Hottest Things A Man Can Do

4. Smile at me while owning a vintage camera.

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Posted on November 21, 2019September 11, 2021 by: Lily Green

ATTENTION: Manic Pixie Dream Girl for Hire!

I have bangs and glasses. I play the ukulele. And I have four pairs of overalls.

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Posted on November 13, 2019September 11, 2021 by: Lily Green

A Day In The Life of the FBI Man In My Webcam

The American public is under constant surveillance, and social media only aids in these pursuits. Mark Zuckerberg is sitting on a huge cache of my …

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Posted on November 9, 2019September 11, 2021 by: Lily Green

Mastering The Art of Asking A Question That’s Actually a Statement — A Manifesto

My peers ask me this all the time. “Why can’t you just ask a question like everybody else?” and “Why do you insist on taking up space?”

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Posted on October 25, 2019September 11, 2021 by: Lily Green

I Talk So Much In Section Because I Must Preserve America’s Democracy: By Every Male Political Science Major

Some people can’t handle the discourse I inspire. Okay, fine, you made me say it – these people are usually women.

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Posted on October 3, 2019September 11, 2021 by: Lily Green

“How Can Medieval Knights Continue Making The Same Tactical Blunders And Expect Different Outcomes?” Says Poli Sci Student Texting Ex During Lecture

Making the same silly mistakes over and over again without ever learning or changing. I would never do something so stupid.  

Anyway, today I texted Brad.

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