BERKELEY, Calif. — Every registered voter at Cal over the age of 18 has an opportunity to vote by November 8th at 8:00 PM, and due to the elections being colloquially referred to as the midterms, some students are confusing the ballot for a multiple choice exam.
“I literally just finished my Econ 100B midterm last week, and now I find out I have this weird national one due Tuesday,” reported sophomore Alexander Henderson, as he tried to make sense of the six pages he had to fill out. “I heard from a friend this one’s opinion-based, and that whatever the majority says ends up being right. Weird they don’t just make an answer key. But, I will say I really like the idea of ranking my answers from what I think is best to worst, that’s way better than just being definitively right or wrong. I wish my physics tests let me do that.”
Other students understand that the midterm election is not a test, but are still annoyed about its name.
“I’m graduating this semester, and after finishing my GEOG C188 midterm I thought I was officially done with midterms forever,” said senior Eyejust Wanttobedone. “But for the past month, whenever I open YouTube, I get bombarded with ads about every proposition imaginable. Like, I know the midterms are important, but can’t we call them something else? I squirm in my seat whenever I hear the word.”
President Joe Biden also weighed in about the importance of election day.
“You know it’s super important to vote,” Biden said as he put on a pair of fresh aviators. “That’s why I’m having Obama’s speeches show up all over your For You Page. I know the youth don’t like me, but after that video of him looking all sexy in his golf cart went viral, I realized people are still thirsting over him even though he killed hundreds of civilians with drone strikes during his presidency. He’s much more charismatic than I am, so I’m using him to bless your feed. Please vote people, I’m trying my best to make America less of a shitshow.”
At press time UC Berkeley students still had to go to class, despite election day being one of the most, if not the most important day of the year.