BERKELEY, Calif.–– True Crime Addicts everywhere, from dank parent-owned basements to beige-colored home pilates studios, are celebrating their favorite podcast host’s newest accomplishment. Ash of the True Crime Addict podcast recently went to instagram to announce the news that she has retaken her IQ test after undergoing intense educational therapy and has come out the other end with an entirely different number – sweet sweet sixteen! In the midst of her celebration and achieving eligibility for the State Drivers License exam, Ash has made time to sit down with us and answer our burning questions.
Ash explained her process of preparing for an exam like this.
“Well—lots and lots of blocks were involved. Some had numbers, some were shapes and you had to fit the shapes into holes—it’s making my head hurt just thinking about it. Clearly the hard work paid off though,” she declared while struggling to count the fingers on her hand.
She further discussed how she will use her newfound intellect to her advantage.
“Well I obviously know who the zodiac killer is now, he’s toast. In fact, I’ve already doxxed a random guy who I blindly believe to be him. As for who killed Jon Benet, I’ll probably have to get back into my studies but it wont take too long. To be honest, though so many murders have been solved already, I want to also use my abilities to do something completely new, like launching a beauty campaign.”
Now fully inspired to utilize her double-digit IQ, Ash has started referring to herself as a PhD candidate because she finally figured out how to spell it.