Skip to content

The Free Peach

Everything Your Relatives Fear About Berkeley

Posted on September 28, 2026September 28, 2026 by: Ellie Shaps

JK! Sagapolutele Enters Transfer Portal

  • Home
  • News
  • Opinion
  • UC Berkeley
  • Blog
  • Join Us!
  • Staff
  • Contact

Tag: no friends

Posted on February 21, 2023September 27, 2023 by: Abhi Ganesh

5 Things ChatGPT’s New Update Does Better Than My Father, Including Words of Encouragement and Playing Catch With Me

BERKELEY, Calif. — Holy fuck, guys. ChatGPT’s new update is actually amazing. While y’all have been using the AI to plagiarize essays and write shitty …

Continue Reading
Posted on November 30, 2022December 1, 2022 by: Veronica Chen

Lack of End-Of-Semester Photo Dump Positively Correlated With Being a Fucking Loser

“While this might have been something that was intuitive, it was truly eye opening to see a concrete association between being a socially inept, uninteresting, unappealing, isolated, lonely individual and lacking a photo dump.”

Continue Reading
Posted on November 28, 2022November 29, 2022 by: Valmic Mukund

Checkmate, Liberals: If I Have ‘White Privilege,’ Why Does Nobody Like Me?

It’s actually quite hilarious that lefties think I have “white privilege” because in reality I am the furthest thing from “privileged.” In fact, I’m a total fucking loser with no friends, colleagues, or classmates who even remotely like me.

Continue Reading

Search

Top Posts & Pages

  • JK! Sagapolutele Enters Transfer Portal
    JK! Sagapolutele Enters Transfer Portal
  • My Midterm Isn’t the Only Thing With A Curve: I Just Saw My Professor on Grindr
    My Midterm Isn’t the Only Thing With A Curve: I Just Saw My Professor on Grindr
  • Trader Joe’s Teases New Kosher Line: Trader Jew's
    Trader Joe’s Teases New Kosher Line: Trader Jew's
  • Stanford Debuts Innovative New DEI Strategy
    Stanford Debuts Innovative New DEI Strategy
  • Frat Brothers Switch To Hazing By Journaling And Meditating
    Frat Brothers Switch To Hazing By Journaling And Meditating
  • Opinion: It’s Technically Only ‘Shackles and Champagne’ if They’re From the Champagne Region of France. Otherwise, You Have to Call Them Sparkling Wine and Zip Ties.
    Opinion: It’s Technically Only ‘Shackles and Champagne’ if They’re From the Champagne Region of France. Otherwise, You Have to Call Them Sparkling Wine and Zip Ties.
  • URGENT: Does Anyone Have a Blue Book I Can Borrow?
    URGENT: Does Anyone Have a Blue Book I Can Borrow?
  • Campus Bathrooms to Now Require Two Factor Authentication
    Campus Bathrooms to Now Require Two Factor Authentication
  • Cut DKE Some Slack. I Fucked A Goat and it Wasn’t That Bad (by George Clooney)
    Cut DKE Some Slack. I Fucked A Goat and it Wasn’t That Bad (by George Clooney)
  • I Am Malala: The Girl Who Stood Up for Waitlisted Students
    I Am Malala: The Girl Who Stood Up for Waitlisted Students

Our Facebook

Our Facebook

Follow us!

 

Copyright © 2026 The Free Peach All Rights Reserved | Magpaper by Theme Palace