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Month: March 2024

Posted on March 28, 2024 by: sophiafingerman

On God: Cal Fraternity Throws Lent-Themed Rager

BERKELEY, Calif. – UC Berkeley’s Chapter of Theta Chi has been placed on probation by the university for throwing a “Lent” party this past weekend. …

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Posted on March 22, 2024 by: Sam Rogers

UC Berkeley to Offer People’s Park Shipping Containers as Temporary Luxury Condos

BERKELEY, Calif. – On Tuesday, Feb 12, UC Berkeley’s housing director, Glen DeGuzmann announced the school’s latest project, “The Wall,” temporarily offering luxury condos inside …

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Posted on March 20, 2024 by: The Free Peach

Inappropriate? CS Professor Makes ‘Do You Like-Like Me?’ Midterm Question Mandatory for Female Students

BERKELEY, Calif. – After making a sexist Ed post comment about “women’s behavior outside the Bay Area,” CS 189 professor Terry Smawldich doubled down by …

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Posted on March 19, 2024 by: chantelwhite

‘I’m Him,’ Says Straight Man Sharing Pronouns in Section

BERKELEY, Calif.— In a random stuffy classroom somewhere within Dwinelle, students in a RHETOR R1B section were restating identities for the class’s new project segment; …

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Posted on March 18, 2024March 18, 2024 by: samgriffith

Embarrassing! Carol Christ Accidentally Shrinks Blue Suit in the Dryer, and Now it Looks a Little Weird

BERKELEY, Calif. — UC Berkeley Chancellor Carol Christ shocked the student body this morning with her latest appearance on Sproul Plaza, during which it was …

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Posted on March 14, 2024 by: sophiafingerman

In the Nick of Time: UCB WarnMe Alerts Students of the Eruption of Pompeii

BERKELEY, Calif. – Yesterday at 1:00 pm, the UCPD-integrated ‘UC Berkeley WarnMe’ announcement system alerted the campus community of the pressing and timely explosion of …

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Posted on March 14, 2024March 14, 2024 by: The Free Peach

Opinion: If It’s the ‘Big Give,’ Why Isn’t it Giving?

  I’d consider myself an expert on this, so I’ll say it: UC Berkeley’s “Big Give” just isn’t giving. Wandering campus daily to distract from …

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Posted on March 13, 2024 by: ephiehauck

Student Testimony: ‘Logging Econ Lectures on Letterboxd Changed My Life’

BERKELEY, Calif. – After avoiding in-person classes for weeks, student River Smith finally discovered a way to make his ECON 150 lectures more interesting: logging …

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Posted on March 12, 2024March 12, 2024 by: Abhi Ganesh

Kip’s Bouncer to Be Permanently Stationed Outside Moffitt to Prevent Underage Overeducation

BERKELEY, Calif. — “I’ll need to see some ID, please,” asserts Berkeley’s latest addition, Kip’s bouncer Chuck O’Hare. He stands brazen, shielding Moffitt Library’s main …

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Posted on March 8, 2024 by: amychakladar

6 Tips on Basic Bus Etiquette Since Apparently, You Think the 51B is Your Personal Fucking Chauffeur

1. You and Your Friends Are Terribly Boring Refusing to move to the back of the bus because you want to stand in the aisle …

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