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Tag: Bernard Chan

Posted on February 5, 2021May 13, 2021 by: Bernard Chan

Fire on Frat Row: Six Injured After Refusing to Stop, Drop, and Roll on the Sticky, Beer-drenched Floor

“This girl, Becky. Her leggings were on fire. I yelled at her to stop, drop, and roll, but she just turned around calmly and told me, ‘Oh my god… no… you want me?… to roll?… on that disgusting floor?’” 

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Posted on December 6, 2020May 13, 2021 by: Bernard Chan

Instead of Course Evaluations, Professors Now Reading Passive-Aggressive Posts on Overheard and Reddit For Feedback

BERKELEY, Calif. – “What kind of class assigns a massive project to be due on the same day as the midterm?” asked Reddit user u/gobears4715 …

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Posted on November 25, 2020May 13, 2021 by: Bernard Chan

Gobble, Gobble: 3 Ways to Make it Clear That You Eat Ass at Your Thanksgiving Family Dinner Table

Buckle up, Thanksgiving season is here, which means it’s that time of the year where you get to sit down and get down and dirty …

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Posted on November 11, 2020May 13, 2021 by: Bernard Chan

If I Violently Jostle My Protein Shake And No One’s Around To Hear It, Did I Even Work Out?

For centuries, philosophers have been embroiled in a vigorous debate that strikes at the very heart of gym bro culture. It’s a question that precedes …

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Posted on November 9, 2020May 13, 2021 by: Bernard Chan

Chris Cuomo edges America for Four Days, Teasing Messy, Explosive Finish

New York, NY – This past weekend, millions of Americans tuned in to CNN to watch Chris Cuomo’s live cam show on the brutal fucking …

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