BERKELEY, Calif. – In a spooky turn of events, Computer Science Undergraduate Advisor Gong Whitdee Ngyuen has apparently changed their meeting availability to séance-only appointments.
On their booking site, the advisor’s announcement reads, “Due to the massive influx of students (both prospective, and prospective but inevitably fruitless) and inadequate office staffing, my appointments have been reworked to only accommodate those who can perform a 19th-century séance to contact my spirit. Please use your official Berkeley Ouija as well, as my haunted Calendly link doesn’t accept private Ouija boards. For all other inquiries, please contact me at my Hotmail, which surprisingly does not need a ritual to work beyond the grave.”
When questioned about their availability and when students can expect in-person appointments again, Ngyuen reportedly left in a puff of sulfuric smoke, but not before scribbling a hasty note.
“I understand this is frustrating for students, but I’ve quite literally been worked to death and then some,” read the advisor’s scrawl. “For all inquires that require operations beyond the capabilities of a standard Ouija board, I urge them to just fucking eeny, meeny, miny, moe or bubble gum in a dish it.”
As for students who are still having trouble reaching their Computer Science advisor, the department suggests consulting the troll under Dwinelle or the use of divine intervention.