BERKELEY, Calif.–– On Sunday, children around the U.S. rejoiced with love and thanks for Mother’s Day. However, as finals loom closer and the men of Berkeley are lonelier than ever, Mother’s Day has taken a slight shift in meaning.
For Megan Cao, this was a notable change in her situationship. After many noncommittal interactions and mediocre nights together, Graham Limber asked Megan if, for one special day, he could call her Mommy. At first, Megan was elated at this news. Maybe this was a sign of a deeper connection between them. Maybe this meant Graham hoped to upgrade her to girlfriend in the near future. This was surely the missing piece to why he only texted her at 1 am.
“This wasn’t that crazy of an adjustment,” said Megan, “I already have his events in my calendar, in case I decide to Irish Hello, or he needs a reminder of his schedule. He says he’s not looking for a girlfriend, but you can’t put a label on how much I care for him. Or do for him.”
However, Megan began to realize that being called Mommy included other expectations. Upon entering Graham’s dorm, he handed her a pile of laundry to do with her CSCPay Mobile money.
When addressing Graham on this matter, Megan shared, “I found out he doesn’t wash his sheets. He thought they just ‘automatically’ cleaned themselves? That’s not even much to wash because he doesn’t even use pillowcases.”
In celebration of this special day, Megan helped Graham decide where to take another girl he was seeing on a date, something she is sure he will be doing for her very soon.
In return, however, he stated he is “not looking for anything serious” and “I don’t know why you thought we were ever anything”. As Graham commits to ‘working on himself’, he plans to spend this upcoming week ripping bag with the boys, ignoring his impending finals, and leading on at least five other girls.