As I researched to educate myself on systemic racism and oppression, I had a revelation: I have been the subject of discrimination by my female classmates at Berkeley. 

Girls won’t hook up with me because I’m in a frat. 

They’ll reject me, citing reasons like “you’re upholding the patriarchy,” “you’re not woke,” and “you literally live in a cesspool.” And the girls who I actually CAN convince to hook up somehow always seem to take issue with banging on my top bunk in our 10-brother bedroom called “The GroomsDen.” I’m obviously doing my best, but it’s like my best is never good enough.

What these girls don’t understand is that I am woke; this is evidenced especially by my activity this summer at the height of the Black Lives Matter protests for the George Floyd thing. I went to  every protest with my red spray-paint and hammer, vandalizing and destroying as many buildings as possible. I helped loot a lot of businesses for the movement, too my favorite thing I got doing anti-racist shit was this sick Ultralite Nano-Puff Jacket from the Patagonia store. 

Even when other protestors were begging me to stop breaking and stealing stuff, I was like, “No, I have to recognize my white privilege, and be a good ally by destroying public property with no legal consequences.” The protestors would shout at me, “Please stop! Be peaceful! You’re not helping us!” It’s as if they didn’t know that one of the only ways to dismantle internalized racism and implicit biases as white people is to convert our racist anger into property damage. 

Also, I am the guy in DKE who “checks” the brotherhood on racism. I got this role because I have a few black friends who are actually really cool and I care about them. For example, the black square I posted on Instagram for #BlackoutTuesday actually got more likes than any of my brothers.’ And I always remind my brothers that they can’t rap the n-word in songs on the rare occasions when there are black people at our parties. Also, during the height of BLM, I led the DKE Instagram George Floyd fundraiser, and we donated $400 to some community in Oakland (down Telegraph).  

At this point, I’m really just angry and frustrated, because it feels like girls want me to be some kind of saint when I’ve done literally everything I can to help out. 


ACAB (Assigned Chad At Birth) 

One Reply to “OPINION: I Spray-Painted Cop Cars for Black Lives Matter. NOW Will You Fuck Me on my Top Bunk in DKE?”

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