BERKELEY, Calif. – Uproar ensued after Sara Wilson, an out-of-state student from Utah who proclaims they “like rain”, still used an umbrella following showers this Thursday morning.
“I don’t understand what the big deal is here, my appreciation for rain does not preclude a desire to remain dry,” Sara argued, noticeably warm and dry. “My umbrella is not a shield against my love for rain, but rather a tool that allows me to engage with it on my own terms. Plus, you can like something without wanting to touch it. At least that’s the explanation my parents give me when they don’t want to hug me.”
Yet, Sara’s stance has motivated a response by more serious rain enthusiasts regarding the nature of participation in precipitation appreciation. While Sara frequently shares raindrop photography on social media and always notes how she loves the smell after it rains, this umbrella incident has left many in doubt concerning the authenticity of Sara’s pluviophilic claims. Notably, the newly formed Soggy Socks Society has come out in protest, advocating for a more immersive floodial experience.
“Umbrellas are for sun lovers,” scoffed the Society’s founder senior, dripping onto the floor of Dwinelle. “You haven’t experienced rain until you’ve squelched home at two on a Wednesday. Nowadays, precipitation praisers think they can just say they like ‘petrichor’ under their canopies of denial and think we’ll let that shit slide. Grow up: step in puddles.”
Further complicating Sara’s actions was the experience of her roommate, herself not a rain enthusiast, who shared a soggy anecdote from their walk back from campus.
“Here I am, getting drenched and she’s just going on and on about how she likes rain, so I ask politely to borrow her umbrella which she immediately refuses. I think if she really liked rain, then she’d actually want to experience it, that’s like saying you like talking to people but only watch TV.”
At press time, the Soggy Socks Society were seen planning their next meeting indoors — just in case it rains.