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Posted on December 26, 2020 by: The Free Peach

Santa Claus, of “Christmas” Fame, Dead at 52

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Category: Local News

Posted on November 25, 2020 by: The Free Peach

Gobble, Gobble: 3 Ways to Make it Clear That You Eat Ass at Your Thanksgiving Family Dinner Table

Buckle up, Thanksgiving season is here, which means it’s that time of the year where you get to sit down and get down and dirty …

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Posted on November 9, 2020 by: The Free Peach

Chris Cuomo edges America for Four Days, Teasing Messy, Explosive Finish

New York, NY – This past weekend, millions of Americans tuned in to CNN to watch Chris Cuomo’s live cam show on the brutal fucking …

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Posted on October 13, 2020 by: The Free Peach

Man Decides This the Year to Be Politically Active in Wake of Favorite Strip Club Closing Down

BERKELEY, Calif. – Local first-time-voter Gerald Thompson decided to participate in November’s election out of ‘absolute necessity,’ after local establishment WunderLust Gentleman’s Club closed last …

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Posted on October 7, 2020October 7, 2020 by: The Free Peach

Next Presidential Debate Replaced by Charcuterie Board Making Competition

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In an announcement made late last night by the Commission on Presidential Debates, the American public was made aware of a historic …

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Posted on October 2, 2020October 2, 2020 by: The Free Peach

Supreme Collabs With GOP On Exclusive Court Position

The GOP seems eager to finally cater to white, suburban youths everywhere.

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Posted on September 23, 2020September 23, 2020 by: The Free Peach

OPINION: Why My COVID Antibodies Make My Cum Taste Better

There are already SO many reasons why girls should give me head. To name a few: 1) because it feels good for me, 2) because …

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Posted on September 22, 2020September 23, 2020 by: Sam MacKinnon

Ellen Degeneres’ Teleprompter Speaks Out

LOS ANGELES — Following the airing of the first episode of Season 18 of “Ellen” yesterday morning, Ellen Degeneres’ teleprompter spoke out about the abuse …

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Posted on September 22, 2020 by: The Free Peach

ANTIFA Leaders To Hold Gender Reveal Party at Confederate Monument

RICHMOND, Virginia — In keeping with their violent yet liberal spirit, an ANTIFA couple recently announced their intention to hold a gender reveal party at …

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Posted on September 18, 2020September 21, 2020 by: The Free Peach

New Scientific Study Finds Coronavirus Immunity in Former FitTea Models

LOS ANGELES, Calif. — The novel coronavirus has presented innumerable uncertainties to the global population, with scientists and doctors worldwide scrambling to create a vaccine …

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Posted on September 15, 2020 by: The Free Peach

President Trump Endorses Eighth Grader’s COVID-19 Fart Test

WASHINGTON, D.C. — According to White House Chief Fart Correspondent William Barr, President Trump has officially come out in support of the COVID-19 Fart Test …

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