“You know, we’re used to being marginalized, but I was still surprised that we were so underrated in the college drinking scene. It’s straight up prejudice!”
Potterheads rejoice! J.K. Rowling revealed in a Twitter thread last night that Hagrid, the beloved groundskeeper of Hogwarts in the globally-acclaimed Harry Potter series, is pro-Palestine.
But the FBI recently released a report detailing what anyone could learn from literally a single episode of Gossip Girl: some people don’t earn their way to the top.
After her parents spent half a million dollars to buy her a spot at USC, it’s important to make her application transparent!
Because climate change isn’t real, right?
Okay, okay. So you’re all upset that we gave Green Book the Oscar for Best Picture. Hell, some of our members here at the Academy probably are too. But before you throw a temper tantrum, just listen:
What did you expect?
Ass this exciting new world of sexual freedom develops, it’s safe to say that women are being liberated, ass they can now admit they have buttholes just like everyone else.
“The second you said you loved me I got, like, super turned off.”
“That being said, we are immensely proud of Travis’ accomplishments in achieving at the age of 34 what Steve Jobs could not even achieve until 56.”
Valentine’s Day is here, and all over UC Berkeley love is in the air, which is a refreshing change of pace from the smoke or the lingering sensation that you’re not good enough.