BERKELEY, Calif. – Despite having attended the University of California, Berkeley, since August 2021, senior and certified dumbass Noah Member has failed to do the …
Graduating Senior Minoring in “School”
BERKELEY, Calif.– UC Berkeley Senior Sydney Qiu impressed family and friends by recently deciding to pursue a minor in ‘School’ in addition to her major …
Report: The Hardest Part of Writing a Thesis is Not Telling Everyone You’re Writing One
When challenged on the flaws in Fournier’s analysis, psychology professor Ivor H. Tower, defended his student’s work with zeal.
“Ms. Turner’s own behavior demonstrates that the urge to share the details of one’s academic work, even in a negative light, is a universal human experience,” Tower retorted. “As someone with extensive experience in academia, I can confidently say that Fournier’s study is both insightful and valid. Why the skepticism? Academic research is fascinating and everyone knows it! The undergrads in my classes hang on to every word when I go on tangents about my doctoral work on the psychology of self-absorption.”
5 Things Scarier Than Seeing ‘View Graduation Checklist’ on CalCentral
Are you actually graduating? Will you be able to function in a 9-5 work environment? Didn’t you start college like two weeks ago? What the fuck is going on? In honor of keeping up with the spooky senior spirit, here are 5 things scarier than seeing “View Graduation Checklist” on your CalCentral.