“You just pick an order you might want weeks ahead and confirm your presale on Ticketmaster. There’s a 15% chance your order gets placed, and Ticketmaster only takes a portion worth double the meal price. It’s a steal, really.”
Blatantly Catering to the Female Gaze: This Boy Wears Glasses
“I actually wear glasses every day,” clarified junior Griffin Bells. “It wasn’t just a today thing. Seriously, I don’t understand how this could be misconstrued as some sort of play to get girls. I can even show you my prescription; I’m literally farsighted. If I read anything without my glasses it’s just indecipherable.”
… Okay, so now he also knows how to read. Could he be any more obvious?
White Girl from LA Fulfills Civic Duty of Criticizing Pop-Listeners Because Her Spotify Wrapped Has Tyler, the Creator in It
Even though you probably have never heard of these artists, it is my civic duty as a white, female teenager from Los Angeles to expose society to art and culture that is unique and different.
The Definitive Ranking of Taylor Swift Albums, Which Yes, I Can Still Listen To and Be Woke. Get Off My Back.
Don’t you fucking judge me, okay? Look, I’m like super woke. I went to the women’s march.