As campus roars back to life, sunbaked and unmotivated students return to the dreaded deluge of bMail notifications. With “Assignment Posted” subject lines nestled between …
QUIZ: Which Disney Princess Are You?
Welcome to the quiz which will reveal the true depths of your Disney Princess soul! But beware, the enchanted forest of Disney hides more than just singing animals and magical spells. It’s also a place where fortunes and fairy tales collide in a whirlwind of self-discovery and enlightenment. So, prepare to dive into a world where happily ever after comes with a side of reality. Let’s get started!
4 Secret Spots on Campus Seniors Should Visit Before They Graduate!
▇▇ is one of my favorite study spots on campus. Ever since I found out about this place, I haven’t had to desperately circle around …
QUIZ: Tell Us How Much You Love Your Family and We’ll Tell You Whether to Get Them $10, $15, $60, or No Graduation Tickets
To celebrate the culmination of your four years of college, the university has decided to follow in the footsteps of Ticketmaster by price gouging its graduation tickets. But how can you determine if you should get $10, $15, $60, or no tickets for your family? Don’t worry, here’s a quiz to help you decide.
QUIZ: Should You Go Out Tonight or Should You Question the Meaning of Human Existence Alone in Your Room Like a Sad Little Loser?
Happy Friday! Woo hoo! Finally, after a long, hard week, you can let loose. Tonight is all about having a good time. Like those people you overheard earlier talking about some ‘big party.’ That sounds fun! Maybe you should go? It could be awesome. But it could also be super lame. Don’t worry: just take this quiz.
Trump Charged With 34 Felonies. To Find Out More Search ‘Trump Rule 34’
The remainder of the reporting is unavailable at this moment. To find out more, please search “Donald Trump Rule 34.”
‘Ryanair Is SO Cheap’ and 2 Other Ways to Act Like Your Spring Break in Europe Hasn’t Put You in Financial Ruin
You’ll be spending what’s left of your savings on a 23 hour, four-layover trip to Paris. Je suis livin’ la vida loca. “But how can you afford that?!” someone asks. You know you can’t. Don’t answer. Don’t check your bank account. Hell, run if you have to. But never admit the truth.
5 Things ChatGPT’s New Update Does Better Than My Father, Including Words of Encouragement and Playing Catch With Me
BERKELEY, Calif. — Holy fuck, guys. ChatGPT’s new update is actually amazing. While y’all have been using the AI to plagiarize essays and write shitty …
Lost Your Clipper Card? Here’s 4 Phone Numbers We Called That Told Us To Fuck Ourselves
2. The Student Transportation Office: (510) 643-7701
Don’t be fooled by the name– like Voltaire said, “This office is neither for students, nor transportation, nor an office.” There is no telling what response you’ll get – they might replace your lost card, but not without a $25 fee that completely negates the notion of a free bus pass. And if you complain? There’s a tried and true response that they’re not afraid to roll out: “go fuck yourself.”