Here are four sex positions to make you feel fleetingly alive before your life-force is eradicated by the realization that you boinked someone who voted third-party “on principle”!
Breaking: Rhetoric 103B Professor Masks Valentine’s Day Loneliness with Marxist Gusto
PSA: After the first few weeks of class, a number of seats have opened up! It’s not too late to sign up for Rhetoric 103B and be even closer to that coveted humanities degree that employers are dying to see!
KA Guy Does Push Ups at Zete Party to Impress Girls
Whether it was truly genius, or merely the weed he smoked earlier, Earnhardt’s idea changed the world of Cal Greek Life.
Local Man’s Kink for Emotional Negligence Tearing Relationship Apart
“The second you said you loved me I got, like, super turned off.”
The Next Steve Jobs? The Founder of This Tech Start-Up Is Dead
“That being said, we are immensely proud of Travis’ accomplishments in achieving at the age of 34 what Steve Jobs could not even achieve until 56.”
Couple Hooking Up for 8 Months That Has Yet to Define Their Relationship Plans to Celebrate Valentine’s Day
Valentine’s Day is here, and all over UC Berkeley love is in the air, which is a refreshing change of pace from the smoke or the lingering sensation that you’re not good enough.
QUIZ: Do You Want Bangs or Did the Boy You Like Just Leave You on Read
The seductive idea crosses every girl’s mind at least once: should you get bangs? Although always tempting, this fun and flirty hairdo can quickly turn …
Home Town Hero: Stacy From Media Studies 10 Keeps Telling Us She’s From LA Even Though It’s Week Three And We Already Know!
Despite the fact that literally, no one asked, and that it’s week fucking three, Sherman Oaks’ finest continued to remind her peers she was from somewhere people are usually gentrified out of living in.
Study Abroad With ISIS Going Poorly
“When I rushed ISIS last year, I was promised a fun semester abroad in the desert with a tight-knit community of like-minded individuals.”
Hilarious! Late Night Comedian Does Donald Trump Impression
Last week, for the past 130 weeks, however, six pioneering comedians all shocked their viewers – bravely going where no other comedian has gone before – by doing an impression of President Donald Trump.