Not to worry! Here are some things you can do with your newfound disqualification from the ASUC!
What You Need To Know Before You Watch Endgame!
The biggest cinema event of a generation came out this week! Here’s what you need to know before you watch!
If You Do Not Fill Out Your Course Evaluation, I Will Unilaterally Wage Jihad (By Your Professor)
I realize that my implicit association of the concept of jihad with the acts of political violence I will definitely inflict on you if you don’t fill out your course evaluation has the ultimate effect of fostering links between Islam and terrorism. As you have guessed, I don’t care, because I am Islamophobic.
10 Songs You NEED To Play At Your Spring Date Party
We guarantee that no matter who’s throwing the party or who you’re there with, these 10 songs will electrify the party like nothing else.
What My Last Six Braincells Are Thinking After Coachella
If you too only have six brain cells left, read this article and share it with your friends!
Girl Who Went to Paris That One Time Personally Affected by the Burning of Notre Dame
Kelsey knew she wanted to do something to show she cared. “I had all these photos from my family vacation to France last summer, have I told you about that? It was such a good trip, we went to Paris, I ate so much food!”
Berkeley Co-op Member Explains Benefits Of Veganism Between Snorts Of Cocaine
Here the conversation took a pause as the local champion of animal rights started gumming the remainder of a drug for which there is an average of six human deaths per kilo sold.
This Quiz Will Tell You Which Berkeley Campus Building You’re Most Like, But Be Careful, Because If You Get Dwinelle, The DPRK Will Automatically Launch A Hwasong-15 Intermediate-Range Ballistic Missile Towards The Sea Of Japan
A decisive move that has the potential to irreparably alter relations Korean Peninsula for the foreseeable future.
What To Email Your Professor When You’re Skipping Class To Go To Coachella
It’s imperative that you email your Professors and GSI’s a valid excuse for your upcoming absence from class, which will truthfully be due to a drug-fueled wonder party, but you can’t actually be honest about it! Here’s an example email that’s sure to work on your teachers.