Skip to content

The Free Peach

Everything Your Relatives Fear About Berkeley

Posted on September 23, 2023 by: Jackie Fenner

To Those Ordering a ‘Flat White’ at Yali’s: I Am NOT on the Menu

  • Home
  • Berkeley
  • Local News
  • Quizzes
  • The Pit
  • Join Us!
  • Masthead
  • Contact

Tag: Joe Biden

Posted on March 22, 2023March 23, 2023 by: Aidan Praytor

‘Fuck It, We Drill,’ Says Biden on Approval of Willow Oil Project

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a controversial decision that has pitted much of the environmental lobby against him, President Biden announced last Monday his approval of the Willow oil drilling project in Alaska with the brief statement, “Fuck it, we drill.”

Continue Reading
Posted on March 25, 2022March 25, 2022 by: Valmic Mukund

Lindsey Graham Faces Bipartisan Backlash After Advocating for His Own Assassination on Twitter

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Senator Lindsey Graham, R-S.C., received bipartisan backlash after he seemingly advocated his own assassination. “My fellow loyal patriots — I urge you …

Continue Reading
Posted on December 12, 2021 by: Tohar Zamir

Supreme Court Possibly Rules Pro-Anti-Abortion, or Something Like That

WASHINGTON — In a landmark case undecided earlier today, the Supreme Court did nothing. Their indecision to be indifferent towards abortion clinics while ignoring the …

Continue Reading
Posted on November 14, 2021 by: Valmic Mukund

Biden Shows CNR Students Solidarity by Falling Asleep During Lecture on Climate Change

GLASGOW, Scotland — Putting to rest any notions that he is out of touch with the youth, U.S. President Joe Biden recently demonstrated his solidarity …

Continue Reading
Posted on February 22, 2021April 27, 2023 by: The Free Peach

Post-Trump, Wealthy White Woke Grandparents Relieved to Return to Peaceful, Undisturbed Life

According to the elderly couple, their beloved daily routine –– waking up, watching television, petting their dog Hubert, walking around an elegant New York suburb and cooking dinner –– was drastically affected by Trump. 

Continue Reading
Posted on November 9, 2020May 13, 2021 by: Bernard Chan

Chris Cuomo edges America for Four Days, Teasing Messy, Explosive Finish

New York, NY – This past weekend, millions of Americans tuned in to CNN to watch Chris Cuomo’s live cam show on the brutal fucking …

Continue Reading
Posted on February 4, 2020September 11, 2021 by: Lily Green

Team Edward Caucusing For Joe Biden

According to polling data out of Iowa, the majority of Team Edward is enthusiastically looking forward to supporting Former Vice President Joe Biden in the …

Continue Reading

Search

Top Posts & Pages

  • Opinion: It’s Technically Only ‘Shackles and Champagne’ if They’re From the Champagne Region of France. Otherwise, You Have to Call Them Sparkling Wine and Zip Ties.
    Opinion: It’s Technically Only ‘Shackles and Champagne’ if They’re From the Champagne Region of France. Otherwise, You Have to Call Them Sparkling Wine and Zip Ties.
  • ‘Meow’ and Five Other  Responses to ‘Describe a  Situation in Which…’
    ‘Meow’ and Five Other Responses to ‘Describe a Situation in Which…’
  • To Those Ordering a 'Flat White' at Yali's: I Am NOT on the Menu
    To Those Ordering a 'Flat White' at Yali's: I Am NOT on the Menu
  • Frank Ocean Emerges From Hiatus to Clarify That He Was Referring to Berkeley City College in Infamous "Novacane" Lyric
    Frank Ocean Emerges From Hiatus to Clarify That He Was Referring to Berkeley City College in Infamous "Novacane" Lyric
  • UC Berkeley #1 in Number of Templated Hackathon App Creators Calling Themselves ‘Founders’ on LinkedIn
    UC Berkeley #1 in Number of Templated Hackathon App Creators Calling Themselves ‘Founders’ on LinkedIn
  • Report: Arnold's Death On The Magic School Bus Is Responsible For Every Single Teenage & Young Adult Problem
    Report: Arnold's Death On The Magic School Bus Is Responsible For Every Single Teenage & Young Adult Problem
  • Wicked! Professor Puts Meme on Slide About Excused Absences
    Wicked! Professor Puts Meme on Slide About Excused Absences
  • REPORT: Is This Baby Onto Something? Bro’s Just Tryna Suckle
    REPORT: Is This Baby Onto Something? Bro’s Just Tryna Suckle
  • New Roommate Refrigerates Maple Syrup, Which is Fine, I Guess
    New Roommate Refrigerates Maple Syrup, Which is Fine, I Guess
  • Opinion: I Refuse to be Bullied for my Chunky White Filas
    Opinion: I Refuse to be Bullied for my Chunky White Filas

Our Facebook

Our Facebook
Copyright © 2023 The Free Peach All Rights Reserved | Magpaper by Theme Palace