Warning: the story I am about to tell you features grave injustices and major gaslighting. Like many other theater-lovers, I attended a show at the …
Barista Complimenting My ‘Early Morning Start’ Unaware I’ve Been Awake for 34 Hours
Embarrassment is a staple of the Berkeley experience. In this masochistic pursuit of my bachelor’s degree, I can claim no shortage of humiliating moments. One …
Finally, a Holiday Where I Can Smoke as Much as I Usually Do and Not Feel Bad About It!
This morning, I woke up earlier than I did all semester to unzip my tent and step out onto the dew-coated Memorial Glade. As my …
UGH: Friend in Dining Hall Really Interrupting My Planned Youtube Session
Earlier this afternoon in Cafe 3, I was trying to pretend to enjoy my pasta with lentil bolognese. My comfort of solitude was accompanied by …
The Official Free Peach Guide to Tax Filing
As we approach the IRS tax deadline, many Berkeley students find themselves first-time filers overwhelmed by confusing tax laws. To combat the deluge of misinformation …
Opinion: If It’s the ‘Big Give,’ Why Isn’t it Giving?
I’d consider myself an expert on this, so I’ll say it: UC Berkeley’s “Big Give” just isn’t giving. Wandering campus daily to distract from …
NBA Super Star? My Ex Sets a Rebound Record
BERKELEY, Calif. — In a turn of events that has left statisticians scrambling for their calculators, sophomore Duncan Dribblen has officially shattered the world record …
Opinion: I’m Celebrating This Weekend With a Super Bowl
Gather around the couch, make your favorite snacks, and turn on the TV, because this weekend it’s time for the super bowl. Wait, what’s this …
Opinion: Something About the Bourgeoisie Doesn’t Sit Right With Me
As a Political Economy major, I have become familiar with the works of many political theorists, most notably Karl Marx. After reading the Communist Manifesto, …
Update: God Misinterpreted My Prayers to ‘Get Soaked’
I seldom pray to God. The only times I’ve prayed to God have been: during college admissions decisions, before confronting my parents about my childhood …