Barista Complimenting My ‘Early Morning Start’ Unaware I’ve Been Awake for 34 Hours
April 22, 2024
lyamashir01
Pope Admits He Could Kiss a Man, But Never Date One
December 4, 2023
New Telegraph Establishment to Sell Experimental Drink ‘Boba’
September 25, 2023
SCOTUS Clarifies ‘Affirmative Action Still Constitutional for White Kids’
June 29, 2023
Out-of-State Student Declares Bankruptcy Instead of Major
January 27, 2023
Study Finds Most Successful Berkeley Student Just Robot With No Emotions, Hobbies, Family, Friends, Desires, Trauma, Opinions, or Values
November 1, 2022
University Bans Electric Skateboards and Scooters Due to “Excessively Annoying Vibes”
September 19, 2022
Why Convert to Christianity When You Can Worship My Consulting Club?
September 3, 2022
Aww! Kid Recruiting You on Sproul Can’t Wait to Brutally Reject You
August 31, 2022
‘I’m Giving Giving Tree,’ Says the Giving Tree Who’s a Tree That’s Giving, Giving Tree, Giving Giving, Giving Giving Tree, and Also Giving Giving Giving Tree
November 18, 2021
Rodgers’ Legacy Almost Complete: QB Throws Tantrums, Misinformation, but No Complete Passes
November 12, 2021
Professor Crawls Out of His Own Asshole to Hold Your Midterm a Day After Halloween
October 31, 2021