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Category: News

Posted on April 24, 2024April 24, 2024 by: sophiafingerman

Guy in Philosophy of Feminism Class ‘Takes Space,’ Still Working on the ‘Make Space’

BERKELEY, Calif. – Reports of a dispute regarding gender parity within the classroom emerged this past weekend following a Thursday lecture for Professor Maloney’s Philosophy …

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Posted on April 17, 2024April 17, 2024 by: chantelwhite

Student’s Stomach Releases Hottest New House Album During Lecture

BERKELEY, Calif. — Restless students fantasizing about their Taco Tuesday plans in Wheeler 150 attempted to pay attention to their ECON 1 professor throughout the …

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Posted on April 15, 2024April 15, 2024 by: Tohar Zamir

Failure of Our Education System: Celtic Studies Class Doesn’t Cover Larry Bird

BERKELEY, Calif.– In a new suit brought forth by the Department of Education against UC Berkeley, reformers allege that current Celtic Studies courses follow an …

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Posted on April 12, 2024April 12, 2024 by: samgriffith

Devastating: Guy Inside Fursuit Actually Really Hot

BERKELEY, Calif. — Early this week, RSO ‘Furries at Berkeley’ grabbed the attention of students and faculty alike as a member removed his fursuit’s headpiece …

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Posted on April 10, 2024April 10, 2024 by: ephiehauck

Psychology Breakthrough: Pavlov’s Dog Actually Just Hungry for Bells

BERKELEY, Calif. — While attending his eight-hour mandatory lab this past Friday, fourth-year psychology major Darren Barry made a discovery that has caused outrage in …

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Posted on March 28, 2024 by: sophiafingerman

On God: Cal Fraternity Throws Lent-Themed Rager

BERKELEY, Calif. – UC Berkeley’s Chapter of Theta Chi has been placed on probation by the university for throwing a “Lent” party this past weekend. …

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Posted on March 20, 2024 by: The Free Peach

Inappropriate? CS Professor Makes ‘Do You Like-Like Me?’ Midterm Question Mandatory for Female Students

BERKELEY, Calif. – After making a sexist Ed post comment about “women’s behavior outside the Bay Area,” CS 189 professor Terry Smawldich doubled down by …

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Posted on March 19, 2024 by: chantelwhite

‘I’m Him,’ Says Straight Man Sharing Pronouns in Section

BERKELEY, Calif.— In a random stuffy classroom somewhere within Dwinelle, students in a RHETOR R1B section were restating identities for the class’s new project segment; …

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Posted on March 18, 2024March 18, 2024 by: samgriffith

Embarrassing! Carol Christ Accidentally Shrinks Blue Suit in the Dryer, and Now it Looks a Little Weird

BERKELEY, Calif. — UC Berkeley Chancellor Carol Christ shocked the student body this morning with her latest appearance on Sproul Plaza, during which it was …

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Posted on March 14, 2024 by: sophiafingerman

In the Nick of Time: UCB WarnMe Alerts Students of the Eruption of Pompeii

BERKELEY, Calif. – Yesterday at 1:00 pm, the UCPD-integrated ‘UC Berkeley WarnMe’ announcement system alerted the campus community of the pressing and timely explosion of …

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