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Everything Your Relatives Fear About Berkeley

Posted on August 27, 2026August 27, 2026 by: The Free Peach

Haas Students Taken Aback By Number Of Coloring Pages Assigned

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Posted on November 7, 2019May 13, 2021 by: Daniella Rosen

Heartwarming: SAE Member Converts to Judaism so he can Miss Class on Rosh Hashanah

We at The Free Peach are personally looking forward to shadowing Mr. Murray, soon to be Chadberg Michaelberg Murrayberg

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Posted on November 6, 2019May 12, 2021 by: Amanda Mier

Pick a Date for Date Party and We’ll Tell You Which of Your Friends He’s Fucked!

Pick a Date for Date Party and We’ll Tell You Which of Your Friends He’s Fucked!

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Posted on November 6, 2019September 11, 2021 by: Sammy Cornick

Spotify Playlist to Listen to as Your Laptop Gets Stolen

Our specially curated playlist features the exact songs you want to be listening to as you turn your attention away from your laptop and someone swipes it and drives away in a car.

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Posted on November 2, 2019May 14, 2021 by: Vasiliki Koutsoulis

New Study Finds Cigarette Smoking Linked to Wanting to Get the Fuck out of Conversation

Fortunately, with the Air Quality Index at the level it is right now in Berkeley, you no longer need to buy cigarettes- all you have to do to get that sweet, sweet buzz is stand outside for 30 seconds.

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Posted on November 1, 2019May 13, 2021 by: Maeve Sneddon

6 Ways to Incorporate an N95 Mask Into Your Halloween Costume

Use two as a bra for your sexy angel costume. 

That’s hot.

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Posted on October 30, 2019May 13, 2021 by: Kelsey Ferrell

Cal Fraternity Brother Unknowingly The Typhoid Mary of HPV

“If I had an STD, I would know it,” said Hawthorne. “It’s not like STDs are some invisible cancer you can accidentally give to other people.”

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Posted on October 30, 2019May 13, 2021 by: Maeve Sneddon

‘It’s So Cold In The Morning But I’m Sweating By Lunch!’ And Other Small Talk You Can Make With St. Peter At The Gates Of Heaven As He Determines Your Eternal Fate

I’m sure the weather at the Gates of Heaven is quite similar to the weather here in Berkeley, so this should be relevant to St. Peter too!

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Posted on October 29, 2019May 19, 2021 by: Cloe Wood

Five Sexy—and Historically Accurate!—Halloween Costumes to Impress Your Crush

Dressing up as Anne Boleyn is a great way to signal to your crush that you’re hot, you could totally secure an alliance with France, and you’re chill with the fact that they’ve already hooked up with your sister.

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Posted on October 26, 2019September 28, 2022 by: The Free Peach

Alvin, Of “Chipmunks” Fame, Dead of Fentanyl Overdose

“Alvin and the Chipmunks” frontman Alvin Seville was pronounced dead at Cedar-Sinai Veterinary Hospital early this morning after an apparent fentanyl overdose. The acclaimed anthropomorphic chipmunk was 61 years old. 

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Posted on October 25, 2019September 11, 2021 by: Lily Green

I Talk So Much In Section Because I Must Preserve America’s Democracy: By Every Male Political Science Major

Some people can’t handle the discourse I inspire. Okay, fine, you made me say it – these people are usually women.

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