Ah, Berkeley. A city rich in culture, diversity, and history. With all of its historic landmarks and Instagram-worthy scenery, it’s no wonder housing prices are …
Help! I Went to Office Hours and Now Can’t Shut the Fuck up About It
For as long as I can remember, I’ve avoided going to office hours. I hated the idea of lingering just outside a professor’s office door …
BREAKING: I Am Free This Saturday If Anyone Wants to Hang Out
BERKELEY, Calif. – According to sources on the Free Peach, accomplished and popular writer Tom Wickline has his schedule open all day this Saturday. This …
College of Engineering Diversity Advert Shows Same Woman 6 Times in Different Costumes
BERKELEY, Calif. — UC Berkeley’s College of Engineering garnered criticism this week upon the release of a diversity pamphlet featuring only one woman, albeit in …
Fuck, There Went All Our “We Lost” Jokes
STANFORD, Calif.- Despite the best efforts of the Stanford Football Team and COVID-19, somehow the Bears clutched a narrow 41-11 victory this weekend. “I just …
OPINION: You Call That Big Game?
So I guess Stanford and Berkeley are duking it out on the gridiron again. Whoop-de-doo. A team with a 3-6 record is going up against …
“Strong” Armed Robber Can’t Even Open Taco Bell Cantina Door
BERKELEY, Calif. — Notorious strong-armed robber Burlap Sachs was arrested this evening while struggling to open the door to the Taco Bell Cantina on Durant …
OPINION: Moffitt Seismic Upgrade to Accommodate the Tremors of My Thicc Ass
Recently, university staff have announced that Moffitt, the beloved school library and best place for crying before finals, will be closed for the Spring 2022 …
Michael Drake Blames Traffic for Taking 2 Years to Arrive at UCAFT Negotiating Table
BERKELEY, Calif. – Massive strikes were averted Wednesday morning when the University of California finally agreed to a fairer labor contract with UCAFT lecturers. The …
‘I’m Giving Giving Tree,’ Says the Giving Tree Who’s a Tree That’s Giving, Giving Tree, Giving Giving, Giving Giving Tree, and Also Giving Giving Giving Tree
BERKELEY, Calif. — Authorities at UC Berkeley distributed reports this past Sunday of a tree that was reportedly a giving tree who was a tree …