Go forth and enjoy, Bears! Use our promo codes HITMYJUUL and MAKEOUTWITHASTRANGER for a Norovirus discount this spring!
If you don’t agree with our assessment, we guess you could actually read into the candidate’s platforms, but that seems like overkill.
And by exhaustive and thorough, we mean we looked at their announcement photos and made up some shit that feels accurate.
“Harvest Is Murder,” “Love Your Roots, Stop Eating Carrots,” and “Corn: America’s Most Exploited Worker.”
Too bad none of them could get in.
Wow! So many facts about the ASUC.
Wherever your Humanities GSI’s office may be, it doesn’t really matter because we all know you won’t be going to office hours anyway!
top being posers and drink some $2 prosecco, you cretins, while I spray myself with Dom, handcuff a chick with real, police grade cuffs, and bask in the glorious French sun.
Getting their tennis racquet restrung.